How To Not Let Your Past Define You - Scott Barry Kaufman

You had me at “if we only view you through the lens of your victimhood, your potential takes a backseat to your pain.”

Nice to see Chris is taking a break from his time acting as the main character Jason in GTA VI.

I noticed that with working out. The first reason I started working out was because of women, but I never stuck to it. Then I was concerned about my physical health, but I was never consistent. Recently, I was struggling mentally, and all the podcasts I watched mentioned that exercise helps with your mentals. That became my reasoning and has remained consistent since. Then I took a week off, and then it became 2, and I started to feel depressed and started to go into my old habits of negativity. Last week was my first week back, not entirely okay, but this week I felt happy. I feel embarrassed because I was going back into my old ways, but I rubberband back to the person I'm trying to build myself up to be.

Hello you beauties. Get access to every episode 10 hours before YouTube by subscribing for free on Spotify - https://spoti.fi/2LSimPn or Apple Podcasts - https://apple.co/2MNqIgw Here's the timestamps: 00:00 Reconciling With Your Past 04:45 What is Victimhood Mentality? 10:26 Where Does Victim Mentality Come From? 14:30 Why is Victimhood So Seductive? 17:46 Our Feeling of Being Broken 20:28 Victimhood in Evolution 30:50 Are Genes Destiny? 37:35 The Dynamics of Epigenetics 44:46 Researching Highly Sensitive People 50:34 How to Recognise if You Are Highly Sensitive 59:19 Advice for Highly Sensitive People 1:04:56 The Role of Internally-Generated Safety 1:09:29 Links Between Self-Esteem & Victimhood 1:12:17 Accepting Your Past Without Being Ruled By It 1:14:05 Where to Find Scott

I’m a therapist and I agree with most of this. I worked it out through my own personal development, where I’m moving into a space where I’m ready to stop dissecting past (which can’t be changed) and feeling sorry for myself, and thinking about my potential future and what I want from now on. While it’s good to talk about this side of it, you need to ensure you don’t forget that processing the past and feeling everything (including victimhood) was an important part of the journey! Hence why trauma-informed therapy is important for a lot of people. It’s just not a permanent place to be in.

Really great episode, with a few delicious moments: - the awkward pause after the Kanye West joke - the "he's bald!" reaction (sounded kinda prejudicial) - SBK saying HPness twice and not realising what he's saying 😅

58:01 Beautifully explained Chris. I continue to feel bad for feeling bad because someone else has it "worse" than I do. So, inevitably I stopped being honest about how I'm feeling.

Thank you for explaining to me why I alternate between intense engagement with the outside world, and solitude.

I really appreciate Barry's message. Society needs to hear more of this ☆

The only positive to victimhood is growing through the pain of it to become a more resilient person. Life is hard and we all need help, but even if we have a community backing us, we still must take self ownership and responsibility; with or without help.