The Love Expert: The REAL Reason We’re Lonely, Loveless, Depressed - Alain De Botton, School Of Life

"Love is a skill to be learned, not just an emotion to be felt."💯

People are not getting enough good quality rest. We were not meant to be on high alert - the stress response should be transitory.

As a therapist myself for 37 years, Alain is so articulate and affirming of the importance of the work. Sometimes I really lose track of that because it is such cloistered work and after many years it just feels normal. I lose track of the amazing privilege of witnessing the vulnerability and courage of people. So many of those I see have helped me grow and inspired me even though they came for help themselves. I think Alain is just brilliant. Thanks for this conversation.

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I love this (paraphrased): People always get unwell because of love (not referring to strictly romantic love). All mental unwellness stems from a deficit of love. There is always an experience of an unbearable cruelty in some way that breaks the mind. And when people get well there is always an experience of love that heals. And an act of love saves us/redeems us.

Kids may not need the 'perfect' parent but they must have one that loves them and shows it so the kids know they are loved.

A good life isn’t a problematic free life, it’s a life in which we’ve found a way to learn from our inevitable pain - what a quote!!

This interview with Alain feels to me like a warm hug in itself. The desire for understanding from Stephen, a willingness to be vulnerable in his questioning, and the deep insight clearly and gently expressed by Alain… Wow, powerful indeed. Love and appreciate them both! 🙏❤️

"The graceful acceptance of your miniscule position in the cosmos is the gateway to calm & harmony." - YES YES YES YES YES!

Love is a skill to be learned, not just an emotion to be felt.