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r/Confession I Embezzled THOUSANDS

2026-06-28 Comedy
61.6k
3.2k
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rSlash
rSlash
1.9m subscribers

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Description

Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/3hJo9o8qFqrblXu1Plkv8L Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/rslash Discord: https://discord.com/invite/VD6eYD3 0:00 Intro 0:08 Loophole 2:03 Brain damage 3:57 Packages 6:06 Tiny notes 8:52 Over dose 9:40 Adopted 10:38 Found money 11:38 Triplets 12:42 Big refund "Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: CC By Attribution 3.0

Top Comments (10)

@lindseymcdaniel3484 2026-06-28

Hey Rslash, Kansas City citizen here. I wanted to kindly inform you that Olathe is an indigenous word and is pronounced "Oh-lay-thuh." Nailed everything else though! 😊

331 18 replies
@mommabear1986 2026-06-28

Brain Damage Story: without fear, life loses its zest. Rage is close to fear, fear reminds us we are alive. My heart goes out to OP.

262 4 replies
@DullyDust 2026-06-28

1:54 the president of the United States could call me while I was dying of boredom and looking for *anything* to do and I still wouldn't pick up 😂

159 15 replies
@Eppon6 2026-06-28

As someone with issues feeling any extreme emotion (except sadness) due to a disorder, I feel sorry for the OP who lost their ability to feel fear. Too often people assume 'negative' things in life are best off removed, not realizing how much of our existence relies on that natural balancing act.

134
@jessicamorgan3568 2026-06-28

The bank should have checked to see who made atm withdrawls, and sought the person out. They literally have all the information they need. If they didn't, op was the only decent person in this scenario.

103 5 replies
@exavior17 2026-06-28

Leaving a note and assaulting someone are two different things.

95 2 replies
@AlexDoodlez 2026-06-28

For the triplet one. Check the footprints and compare them to the birth certificate. This is why they put footprints on the babies birth certificate. This was literally an episode of Full house.

76 2 replies
@jamiesuejeffery 2026-06-28

I’ve been a Christian pastor for over 30 years now. One of my parishes had brand new construction (that I did not any part of) but only a roughed in sanctuary. The Sunday before we put in the insulation and the Sheetrock, I had every single parishioner leave a note and sign their name on the exposed studs. When that building comes down (and all will eventually) it will have every single parishioner’s prayers and note on the studs. I hope that one day, in 200 years, they will be found and saved.

67 1 replies
@Lotuswalker 2026-06-28

In Germany we have rules for found money. First off, it must be reported for example to the nearest police station immediately, if more than 10€, otherwise you will get a hefty fine. You then get a finders bonus of 5% until 500€ or 3% for more. If no one comes to collect it, after 6 months, you are granted ownership.

60 5 replies
@lostshadows768 2026-06-28

Story 4: It's not really similar, since one is, idk, littering and the other is assault.

37

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