The Science & Process of Healing from Grief | Huberman Lab Essentials

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Grief is not something you “get over.” It is something your mind and body slowly learn how to carry differently. Healing does not mean forgetting. It means finding a way to keep loving without losing yourself.

This video helped me realize that I need to start a grief practice, a personal exercise, the same way I need to start a smaller muscle training routine. Not treating the practice like an afterthought, but as an essential part of moving through life like a rational human being. Thank you for your interest in communicating science to the general public.

The idea that grief requires a literal “remapping” of expectations and attachment circuits is fascinating. It explains why loss can feel less like a single emotion and more like the brain repeatedly searching for someone who no longer exists in your reality.

This really resonated with me. It’s been many years since my husband passed, so I don’t expect him to walk through the door or call anymore, but the grief still rises up in the moments where he should have been here, our sons graduating, major milestones, those once-in-a-lifetime moments. And honestly, sometimes I still feel angry that he’s gone, especially when I try dating and realize how rare it is to be treated with the kind of love, steadiness, and care he gave so naturally.

I lost my son 7 years ago. I still get stuck in the "what ifs" I think as a parent your main job is to raise your children to provide, help them grow and live. I feel like I failed in my most important job. I have to focus on the good and not the "what ifs". There's nothing I can do about the past, but our thoughts can be strong. I appreciate your videos on grief. I wonder if you could do one just on child loss. I've experienced all losses, my mom, 2nd mom, brother, cousin, best friend, but child is as they say "the greatest loss".

I lost 2 of my sisters to suicide in the past few years, it's changed my world and has been the biggest learning curve of my life to say the least. Thank you for this Andrew, will give it a listen.

The prediction machinery angle is an interesting part: the brain doesn't just feel the loss; it keeps running the same expectations it always has. Expects them to walk in. Expects the phone to light up. Not because you're in denial, but because a system built on thousands of confirmed predictions doesn't just stop when the data stops coming in. What Huberman doesn't quite name is how disorienting that is at a mechanical level. Most people experience that loop as a failure - like they're not grieving correctly, or they're holding on too tight. But it's not sentiment. It's the prediction engine doing exactly what it was designed to do, with inputs that no longer exist. That reframe doesn't make it easier. But it does make it less like something is wrong with you - and more like something is working exactly as built, in a situation it wasn't built for.

Thank you for acknowledging the loss of animals as a source of grief.

Thank you, I look forward to listening & learning. My sister passed away suddenly & unexpectedly 3 days ago. The timing of this information is perfect & appreciated. Thank you. GOD BLESS 🙏 💫❤️