Mother Hunger: The 3 Signs You Have This Hidden Childhood Wound & How to Heal
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Top Comments (10)
I am one of the walking wounded. No one has EVER described my life as clearly as this woman has. THANK YOU ❤️ (I'm 65 yrs old and STILL trying to overcome.😞)
"What I love most about this is that it’s not about blaming mothers at all. Instead, it’s about understanding the intergenerational trauma that gets passed down through generations. Kelly's mature and compassionate perspective on this is just beautiful! ❤️"
As a woman raised by a mother with severe manic bipolar disorder, this conversation resonated with me deeply, especially the phrase, “a yearning for a certain quality of love.” My mother was mentally, emotionally, physically, and religiously abusive, so I learned very early that love felt conditional and unpredictable. And when Kelly said, “Whatever we did to earn her approval is who we become,” I felt that in my bones because so much of my personality was built around trying to stay safe, stay invisible, and somehow finally be “good enough.” What struck me most though, is how this work changes the way I parent my own adult sons. The more I learn about my own wounds and nervous system patterns, the more I recognize where I got things wrong with them. I don’t wait for them to come to me; when I realize something, I go to them, apologize directly, and tell them what I wish I had done differently. They always tell me I did the best I could, but honestly, I never accepted that explanation from my own mother, so I refuse to hide behind it myself. I want accountability, repair, and emotional honesty to be part of the legacy I leave instead.
I was never enough ! I used to be beaten to obey and was given orders to do things like a trained dog ! I am 55 now and still hate taking photos or videos of myself....I was always best at school , best at university , best at sports , best at anything I do and never felt safe, loved or supported ! Her changing moods, coldness , never saying a kind word to me ... I was so hungry for her love and attention that it turned into hatred first and then indifference to her . God forgive me , but I don't care how she feels ... Instead, I gave all my love and support to my two children and they grew up confident, loved , safe and feeling they have all the support they ever need !
I would love for her to dive into how mother hunger shows up in men, because mothers birth both daughters and sons.
My mother wasn’t abusive or mean to me. What I wanted more than anything was her love! A hug! Listening to me! Her support! I felt invisible! At 13 I developed eating disorders. Struggled for 20 years. My mother passed away at 91. Never connected with her. There was no love. Very sad! I will be buying her book! This video has been very helpful! Thank you!❤
I'm thankful I had a kind mother. She wasn't perfect but she had a traumatic life and yet she was still kind and empathetic and served everyone relentlessly.... I will always hold my mother close to my heart.
My Mom was 5 when her Mother passed so I know my Mom did her best with me. Thank you Mom🩷💕💓
My mother was a complicated woman. She sacrificed so much for her six children. She worked constantly, she provided, and she pushed us toward higher education. But she also carried a meanness that cut deep. I still remember picking her up from a friend’s house and hearing her friend say, “She’s not that fat,” as if my body were a topic for casual commentary. I was 5'2" and 129 pounds, hardly the whale my mother made me feel like. And that moment was not an exception. My waist was too thick, my legs were too muscular, my cheeks were too fat, and even my wedding photo became another opportunity for criticism. Because of that, I am making up for the girl I once was. I am pouring DOUBLE THE LOVE into 🥰 my son 😘 so he will never experience the pain I endured. I am breaking the cycle. I am raising a child who will never have to question his worth, and in doing so, I am finally giving my younger self the love and tenderness she needed. My 'young self' in my older body is continuing to heal..... 🙏❤. #motherhunger 💔
I do NOT think that people/mothers always do the best that they could/can. I know I don't always do the best that I can. If a mother is abusive, neglecting and watches while her child is abused, there's no way that's the best she can do. Especially after being told to stop and get help and she refuses. I absolutely will not be around someone, doesn't matter who it is, who is abusive. Yes, we all want a good relationship with our parent, but it takes two people to put in the work.
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Top Comments (10)
I am one of the walking wounded. No one has EVER described my life as clearly as this woman has. THANK YOU ❤️ (I'm 65 yrs old and STILL trying to overcome.😞)
"What I love most about this is that it’s not about blaming mothers at all. Instead, it’s about understanding the intergenerational trauma that gets passed down through generations. Kelly's mature and compassionate perspective on this is just beautiful! ❤️"
As a woman raised by a mother with severe manic bipolar disorder, this conversation resonated with me deeply, especially the phrase, “a yearning for a certain quality of love.” My mother was mentally, emotionally, physically, and religiously abusive, so I learned very early that love felt conditional and unpredictable. And when Kelly said, “Whatever we did to earn her approval is who we become,” I felt that in my bones because so much of my personality was built around trying to stay safe, stay invisible, and somehow finally be “good enough.” What struck me most though, is how this work changes the way I parent my own adult sons. The more I learn about my own wounds and nervous system patterns, the more I recognize where I got things wrong with them. I don’t wait for them to come to me; when I realize something, I go to them, apologize directly, and tell them what I wish I had done differently. They always tell me I did the best I could, but honestly, I never accepted that explanation from my own mother, so I refuse to hide behind it myself. I want accountability, repair, and emotional honesty to be part of the legacy I leave instead.
I was never enough ! I used to be beaten to obey and was given orders to do things like a trained dog ! I am 55 now and still hate taking photos or videos of myself....I was always best at school , best at university , best at sports , best at anything I do and never felt safe, loved or supported ! Her changing moods, coldness , never saying a kind word to me ... I was so hungry for her love and attention that it turned into hatred first and then indifference to her . God forgive me , but I don't care how she feels ... Instead, I gave all my love and support to my two children and they grew up confident, loved , safe and feeling they have all the support they ever need !
I would love for her to dive into how mother hunger shows up in men, because mothers birth both daughters and sons.
My mother wasn’t abusive or mean to me. What I wanted more than anything was her love! A hug! Listening to me! Her support! I felt invisible! At 13 I developed eating disorders. Struggled for 20 years. My mother passed away at 91. Never connected with her. There was no love. Very sad! I will be buying her book! This video has been very helpful! Thank you!❤
I'm thankful I had a kind mother. She wasn't perfect but she had a traumatic life and yet she was still kind and empathetic and served everyone relentlessly.... I will always hold my mother close to my heart.
My Mom was 5 when her Mother passed so I know my Mom did her best with me. Thank you Mom🩷💕💓
My mother was a complicated woman. She sacrificed so much for her six children. She worked constantly, she provided, and she pushed us toward higher education. But she also carried a meanness that cut deep. I still remember picking her up from a friend’s house and hearing her friend say, “She’s not that fat,” as if my body were a topic for casual commentary. I was 5'2" and 129 pounds, hardly the whale my mother made me feel like. And that moment was not an exception. My waist was too thick, my legs were too muscular, my cheeks were too fat, and even my wedding photo became another opportunity for criticism. Because of that, I am making up for the girl I once was. I am pouring DOUBLE THE LOVE into 🥰 my son 😘 so he will never experience the pain I endured. I am breaking the cycle. I am raising a child who will never have to question his worth, and in doing so, I am finally giving my younger self the love and tenderness she needed. My 'young self' in my older body is continuing to heal..... 🙏❤. #motherhunger 💔
I do NOT think that people/mothers always do the best that they could/can. I know I don't always do the best that I can. If a mother is abusive, neglecting and watches while her child is abused, there's no way that's the best she can do. Especially after being told to stop and get help and she refuses. I absolutely will not be around someone, doesn't matter who it is, who is abusive. Yes, we all want a good relationship with our parent, but it takes two people to put in the work.