r/TIFU Oops... I Set Myself on Fire

The Flight story: Literally the only person who did anything wrong was OPs partner

Alright, the toothbrush one was 200% justified. If I kissed a girl and she asked me about my teeth I'd assume the same about bad breath

That second last story... well, the "couple" didn't exactly bring someone else into their fight. OP just wanted to give his GF a third-party source to validate things. She refused to accept that and doubled-down and then she brought the flight attendant into the fight because her pride wouldn't let her admit she was wrong. Red flag, gonna need to have a talk about that.

Last story: i was so befuddled by the title thinking "how on earth does someone almost poison themselves with cyanide?" then the cherries were mentioned and i realized immediately where this was going. But then it was mentioned that this guy used to CHEW the pits and the befuddlement came back. What kind of dental sorcery is this?!

I missed so many signs in high school if it had been a driving test I would have been arrested....

12:14 "ive spent my childhood building up an immunity to cyanide poisoning" -Westly, the Princess Bride, probably.

How is getting an eyewitness dragging a stranger into your fight? The girlfriend is jumping to conclusions based on what she thinks happened. You can’t disprove a negative.

When it comes to men reading women it's always funny because so often if you're the one getting them you're oblivious but if you're watching/hearing about it it couldn't be more obvious

Petition for R/Slash to do a whole video about people missing signs! 🙋‍♂️ That was really funny.

God forbid that someone offers comfort to a complete stranger 🤦‍♀️